I’m learning Spanish and the grammar displeases me, but if I change it to fit my desires, I miss it up. The same is true with love language. True love language isn’t uncomfortable when people disagree with or disapprove of each other’s behaviors and beliefs.

Love language speaks with an open heart in order to kindly guide people toward truth and to turn them from error. It never calls people who kindly disagree with each other “haters.” Love language doesn’t retaliate (or “retali-hate”) when it feels like it has been wronged.

Unconditional praise and approval aren’t the language of love. True love language doesn’t speak approvingly when people are causing harm to themselves or others.

Love language is sometimes encouraging and sometimes corrective. If you see me about to be blindsided by a bus, please tell me.

Love language isn’t always sweet and tender. Sometimes it’s strong and straightforward. I don’t always like the love language that people who care about me use when they lovingly correct me, but I need to hear it.

Pride is not a part of love language, but humility is essential to it. Dishonesty and deception disrupt love language. Love language never demands people’s approval or respect.

The best book about love language is the Bible. Read it like a love letter from God, not like a theological textbook.