For the best defense, don’t take offense

Life offers many opportunities to be offended. Try not to take them.

Taking offense is a huge expense that can bankrupt relationships and separate friends. The “take offense — get angry — hold resentment” sequence doesn’t make sense. Perhaps we should stop it.

The best defense of your inner peace is to avoid taking offense. Taking offense cuts off conversation and shuts down relationships.

One of the hardest acts of kindness is to forgive the unkindness of others and to offer them kindness instead of offense. Even when offense is intentionally given, there’s no requirement that it must be taken. (You can choose to ignore it.)

Love goes beyond being offended; to being convicted. Offense says, “They’re wrong.” Conviction says, “I’m wrong.” Love is the willingness to not take personal offense at the wrongful things people say or do, but to disagree with kindness.

By being polite in a rude culture you can sometimes relieve a person’s heavy heart. Don’t let our rude, crude, lewd, unglued, skewed, feud culture intrude your mind and delude your heart.  Insults are not a way to get good results when you’re working with people.

It’s easy to see the wrong doing of others, but our own wrongs wear camouflage. Denial of truth is a display of emotional weakness. It takes courage and maturity to openly admit the truth.

Don’t learn to lose, but learn to learn from your losses. For me mental health requires a lot of inner hard work and ongoing spiritual warfare. However, I need more than just going to church. Church is too often like a fake thermostat. The preacher appears to make adjustments, but nothing changes.

About Steve Simms

I like to look and think outside the box. In college I encountered Jesus Christ and I have been passionate about trying to get to know Him better ever since. My wife and I co-lead a non-traditional expression of the body of Christ in Nashville based on open participation and Spirit-led sharing. We long to see the power and passion of the first Christ-followers come to life in our time. I have written a book about our experiences called, "Beyond Church: An Invitation To Experience The Lost Word Of The Bible--Ekklesia" that is available in Kindle & paperback @
This entry was posted in anger, being offended, broken relationship, church, civility, culture, culture wars, how to not take offense, inner peace, kindness, mental health, peace, resentment, thermostat, Uncategorized, wrong doing and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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